Loss

It happened again. This past week we awoke to the sound of silence and realized our power was out. I wrote about the last time in my post “Unplugged” on December 16, 2024. While then I looked for the upside of being without power, this experience has been much different. Although our electricity has now been restored, the reason for the loss is not over yet.

We were aware that the Santa Ana winds were coming. In preparation, we closed the umbrellas in our backyard securing them tight, and planned outdoor activities accordingly. Little did we imagine that soon we’d be inundated with news of the Pacific Palisades Fire. Then the Eaton fire. Then the Kenneth Fire. Then the Hurst Fire. Then the Archer Fire. At least two other fires in Los Angeles and Ventura Counties were reported, but since have been inactivated.

The closest to our house is the Kenneth Fire in the West Hills and Calabasas area of Los Angeles County. It has burned over 1,000 acres and fortunately is now 100% contained. A respite for the moment. While the sun is shining and the temperature is a comfortable 70 degrees, it’s deceiving. I can see the winds kicking up, bending tree limbs and blowing leaves all around outside my window. I can smell fire outside our front door.

With a loss of power for three days we didn’t see the news until we drove to a hotel to charge our devices. Images on the TV in the lobby were shocking. Big bright beautiful houses, buildings, and landmarks reduced to black and white rubble and ash. Heartbreaking doesn’t even begin to describe this devastation.

The last time I felt these feelings of helplessness, fear, and worry was a little over six years ago. Then the Woolsey Fire that began in Los Angeles County, threatened to race over the Santa Monica Mountains into our community and surrounding areas here in Ventura County.

From my journal: November 10, 2018, Newbury Park, California

“We can see the plumes from our backyard…the air is still thick with smoke…hard to breathe…don’t have to evacuate yet…so many people have lost their homes. Painfully sad…”

Until I had experienced the Woolsey Fire, I hadn’t known how truly frightening an event like this could be. As I write this, the Palisades Fire has burned over 22,000 acres and is only 11% contained. The Eaton Fire has burned over 22,000 acres and is only 15% contained. The Hurst Fire has destroyed about 800 acres and is 89% contained. And the Archer Fire is now under control.

Winds are forecasted to pick up again tonight and tomorrow. We are as prepared as we can be. And while we are currently safe, my brother-in-law and nephew’s home in Altadena burned down in the Eaton Fire. Hearing this news, I felt sick and began to cry.  My heart hurts for them. My heart aches for everyone effected by these fires. It seems so surreal. I don’t know what to say or what to do. There hasn’t been time to process any of this. All of this loss. Loss of land, homes, businesses, communities, lives…loss for words.